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Father and daughter

  • You’re weird
  • You’re idiosyncratic
  • You’re a dick
  • You’re okay
  • You’re soooo fucking clever
  • You’re an idiot
  • You’re mind numbingly banal
  • You’re my friend…

these are all things I’ve been called over the years and I’ve been called many more but I’ve never been called normal and there’s reasonable reason for that too.

However, if anyone ever called me normal I’d immediately correct them as I don’t believe there is any such thing as normal – only perspective and opinion.

You may now be asking two things, the first is, ‘I thought this was a blog about running – what is this rubbish?’, the second is, ‘why am I reading this?’

Well I can answer at least one of those! I’m writing about ‘normal’ because as a parent I find it one of the most offensive things you can say and that I want to ensure that my child is as far from normal as possible.

I’ve never been a fan of words and descriptions that attempt to create a conformity to some arbitrary standard but what really got me irked was when my daughter, ASK said this, ‘I don’t want an adventure story tonight, I want a normal story’.

Let me add some detail…

Each evening ASK gets a minimum of two stories, one that is from a book and one that the GingaNinja or I will make up on the spot – we refer to these as ‘Adventure Stories’. The reason we have named them so is to create distinction between the two types of stories she receives and more importantly these off the cuff tales are high on adventure and adrenaline fuelled pursuits involving noise, lights, acting and action! I was very saddened when she said, ‘I want a normal story…’ what she meant was she wanted a story from a book. I was quite shocked to hear her say ‘normal’ because it was a wholly inappropriate use of the word and I felt compelled to explain to her that there is no such thing as normal.

I can see that we many of us wish to ‘fit in’ and be normal but to be normal suggests that anything outside of your own opinion of normal is abnormal, different and that is often presented in negative terms – so when ASK asked for a normal story what she was saying to me was that non-book based stories were abnormal.

Now I’m projecting adult sentiment upon a three year old that currently isn’t there. However, and perhaps this is the point, if I don’t challenge ‘normal’ now and prove that there is no such thing then she will accept social normality as right and that is unacceptable to me.

The funny thing is that normal is, in our society, in our language everywhere and we’ve been conditioned to accept it as the price of society, though I’ve always been careful about my usage of it in language. But society at large has made something of a beeline for being normal…

  • ‘That behaviour isn’t normal’
  • ‘Normal, hard working families’,
  • ‘Life will return to normal soon’,
  • ‘as normal you can be…’,
  • ‘[s]he had a normal upbringing’,
  • ‘Can you just act normally’
  • ‘I just want to be normal’
  • ‘Delivery is normally between 3-5 days’

I can be, on occasion, as guilty as anybody about being lazy in language, not being as verbally dexterous as I know I am capable of but understanding that I have a responsibility to support my young daughter in being as accepting of things that don’t conform has enabled me to think twice about what is being said and to even further promote diversity, difference and challenge.

This is not a call to arms to unburden ourselves of the shackles of modern life – not at all – we still have to live, it is more that perhaps we have become too blind to the ideas of what is acceptable. I suppose I would ask if we have become lazy about allowing boundaries to be defined for us? Let’s be honest the illusion of freedom still isn’t freedom.

Perhaps it’s a little like this, life has become that prepared, curated music playlist – you’ve listened to 5ive, Slam Dunk the Funk so you’ll probably be interested in Boyzone, but we won’t be showing you any Bach or Beck.

You’ve been spoon fed ‘bread and circus’ to make ‘normal’ acceptable and we, as a society then pass this message on generationally and therefore make a mostly compliant society.

I overheard two middle aged women reading a magazine, or rather browsing pictures, and on several occasions heard phrases like, ‘she just doesn’t look right, it’s not normal’. My grandmother often asks why I don’t dress ‘normally’ or wear ‘normal’ shoes and my answer to that is constant, ‘can you define what a normal shoe looks like?’ What they mean is, both my grandmother and the women I overheard is, ‘why don’t you conform to my idea of life?’

Conforming didn’t give us great innovation, huge creativity or adventurous exploration, following a societal norm puts constraints on us that we might simply not need. Within all of us i am absolutely sure that we have the capacity for great things if we only look that bit further.

At a time when the world is in trouble I’d urge all of us to say ‘fuck normal, be abnormal, be different, think wild, act beyond and accept that you don’t need limits’. The thing about being your own person is there are no guidelines, no rules – except that following a predefined, ordered path is unlikely to get you to where you want to be.

In the end ASK may choose to be a conformist, she may wish to adhere to a social norm but I live in hope that she will demand more from herself and the world around her.

Just something to think about

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My second race of the weekend wasn’t my race at all, it belonged to my daughter, ASK and I’ve never been more ecstatic not to be racing.
I remember when she was born, almost exactly three years ago that I decided I would enter a race with her and aged 15 days old she completed the Dartford Bridge 2km Fun Run with myself, the GingaNinja and Pops (my father).

Well much has changed since that race, ASK has become a boisterous toddler, my father and I fell out over Hillsborough (although it was always made clear he was welcome at our door to see ASK whenever he wanted) and both the GingaNinja and I have lost half a yard of pace due mainly to Dominos Pizza.

Anyway three years later we return to the scene of her first medal triumph, only this time she’s powered by her own legs.

Now I’ve been accused by many of being a pushy parent getting her to run but the truth of the matter is she asked me to find her a race because, ‘I want another medal dad’. She also asks to go training and use both the running buggy and the Unirider – I think it’s fair to say she’s the pushy toddler and I’d rather be taking her running than having her sat infront of Dora the Explorer or Paw Patrol!


Anyway we rocked up to the start line just after the 10km had started and we paid our £3 entry fee (which would be going to a local good cause) and waited for the main race runners to come in. ASK stood transfixed at the sides watching runners of all shapes and sizes crossing the finishing line and claiming their medals – desperate to know when she could get started! 

Before long it was time to line up – kids from near newborns to 13 and 14 year olds. We eyeballed a couple of our fellow toddlers that we knew we could take down and when the horn erupted we set off from our position at the back of the pack like lightning.


ASK quickly set a steady if unspectacular pace for the first 500 metres, preferring to soak up some of the undeserved adulation she was receiving! But once out of sight of the supporters we made better time taking two other runners on the first corner, followed quickly by a slightly older girl whose interest seemed to have waned a little. By the time we had reached the end of the first kilometre we had taken out another couple of runners but the field had now spread itself out but with just 8 minutes on the clock we looked to be making good time and ASK showed no sign of stopping (other than for water breaks).

In the distance – some 200metres ahead – we saw a couple of older boys, probably aged about 10 and we suggested to ASK that we could try and catch them. As they disappeared around the corner and into the final stretch she looked dejected that they had gotten away. 

‘Do you want to catch them?’ we inquired. ‘Yes’ replied ASK and so with that we hit the go faster afterburners and our little daughter responded with much enthusiasm and although we would never catch the boys we knew that the sounds and sight of the finish line would give her a huge lift to finish well. 


With just a couple of hundred metres to go ASK geared up again and started hurtling towards the finish – the remainder of the crowds cheering her every last step home.

Cruising through the barrier she stopped only briefly to grab a medal (we offered thanks in her behalf) and then some rehydration and refuelling – this had been a gruelling race.


What can I say? There are a few things to say about the race, the organisers and ASK.

Firstly let me congratulate Bridge Triathlon events who year in, year out put on lovely events for all ages and all abilities. As a regular runner I’ve taken part in a few of the events as has the GingaNinja and ASK marks her third Bridge Triathlon event here.

The Dartford Bridge 10km and the 2km fun run really help promote a healthy running lifestyle and it’s low key approach in a simple setting make this a perfect September Sunday morning event.

Secondly the event itself is magnificent, either the 10km or the 2km (the only reason I wasn’t doing the 10km was because I’d ruined my groin at the RunWimbledon marathon the day before). The route is fast and flat and if you want it to be it’s a really good event for racing FAST!

And finally, ASK (my UltraBaby) What can I say other than, well done little daughter of mine. She ran brilliantly, she ran fast and she wanted to do it and is already inquiring as to when she can get her next race medal. So if you know of an upcoming event please let me know – I’ve got a three year old ready to race and that’s an attitude I’m happy to encourage.


Stood at the back of the first family wave at the Vitality Westminster Mile reminded me of every race I’ve been in – the difference was that this time I was accompanied by both the GingaNinja and UltraBaby. For the first time UB was taking to the tarmac for a race powered solely by her own two little feet. Yes it’s true that she’d completed the Chislehurst Chase 2km last year but that was trail and I was quite excited to see what 6 months of growing, the training and some slightly more technical kit might draw out of her. 


As Lord Sebastian Coe dropped the flag at the sound of the starting horn we belted out of the ‘starting blocks’ and pushed hard. As parents we kept hold of our little athletes hand and reminded her of the medal we were aiming for.

Our training had been pushing for the mile in between 15 and 18 minutes and as we hit the first 400 metre marker at 3mins 12secs I did wonder if we might even break 15 minutes. The route had lots of awesome support to help keep us going and the Steel Drum band gave us a bit of a boogie wiggle opportunity. There was such a positive atmosphere that you couldn’t help but want to push on!


At 600metres in, the clock ever ticking, we encountered a problem though – UB wanted to run alone!

We tried a couple of parenting tactics to get her to hold onto us but to no avail…

  • She simply stopped.
  • Bottom lip drooped.
  • A little tear slid down her face.

The seconds ticked on and with a thousand metres to go I was worried we wouldn’t get started again. It was then than a little girl went past us and I used her as the reason to get going again, ‘look at that little girl…’

UB relented and pursued the young girl with all the vigour she could muster – faster than before and encircled, hands free, by her parents.


Cheers erupted from all over the course, volunteers and spectators generously giving of their applause. UltraBaby returning the response with a series of double thumbs up, culminating in lots of ‘ahhhhh’ from the crowd. But with a great swathe of focus we had pushed to the final quarter of the race, before us we could see other runners and we encouraged UB into one final effort.

Over the line my little monster raised her arms in the air and cried ‘ice-cream’ (a promise I had made her during her mini meltdown). We had done it!


With meltdown we finished in 16mins 04secs. I was incredibly proud and watched with a little lump in my throat as she strode around displaying her medal to all that would look, telling them that she ‘won’ her race. I shan’t be dropping the crushing reality on her just yet that she wasn’t quite the overall winner.


Post race we ambled around the race village (while UB slept) – listened to Seb Coe talking and generally soaked up the amazing race day atmosphere. What a lovely way to spend a Sunday morning!


Toddler Kit: For those of us looking for reasonably priced running t-shirts and shorts for our toddlers can I recommend Uniqlo, who have a reasonable range of smaller non cotton kit ideal for the active toddler. UltraBaby was wearing the 3 year old sized short sleeved ‘boys’ top and the peach shorts and UB is a small(ish) 2 and a half year old.


Conclusion: What I can say is that the Westminster Mile is a mass participation event that feels small scale, low key and uber friendly. It never feels pressured and has a smoothness that keeps it feeling that way.

The family friendly nature of the event means you aren’t worried about bringing gran or grandad along (as we did the first time we did it) nor do you have any concern about having your toddler or younger with you. I ran this our first year with UB strapped to my front and loved it – this time she’s old enough to do it herself and run in a great time. More events could learn to be this family supportive.

The only thing I would love to see is this event replicated across the UK – to help build sporting achievement in the UK and as Seb Coe said at the event ‘everyone can run’ and mostly he’s right. So let’s spread events like this to every corner of the UK.

On two final notes, the first is a huge thank you to the army of volunteers and supporters who make this event feel special (especially for the younger runners who are hugely encouraged by the positive, inclusive atmosphere). 

And the second thing, get involved, you won’t regret it.


Periodically I write about the adventures of my daughter (aka UltraBaby/ASK) and I, this blog post will update regularly and provide links to the tall tales that formed those adventures because we don’t just run… we just mainly run.

Climbing: We rolled back the years when we visited Evolution Climbing and it turns out ASK is a natural. Click the link to read more

Being Funky: Tales from the dancefloor at Rave-a-Roo and GrooveBaby. Click the link to read more

Taking to the ice: some festive fun and our first experience ice skating. Click the link to read more

Chislehurst Chase: ASK rocks up to the Chislehurst Chase and gives it some welly on the trail. Click the link to read more

Cultural Lanzarote: capturing some of the cultural delights of Lanzarote. Click the link to read more 

Rancho Texas: YeeHaa as we saddle up for a bit of light theme parking in the Canary Islands. Click the link to read more

MeeMeep, buggy runner coming through: how ASK and I get to go racing together. Click the link to read more

Dartford Bridge Fun Run: nothing like being 3 weeks old and competing in your first race. Click the link to read more

Oooooo – The Mountain Buggy Unirider…

I’ve been itching to offer my insights, or lack thereof, into the Mountain Buggy Unirider since the moment I bought it – a device so simple you’ll look at it and say ‘why didn’t I think of that?’ You’ll wonder perhaps, as you look at the pictures of the device, why anyone would be willing to part with any money at all for a device you could cobble together in your garden shed.

Here’s the thing, neither you or I thought of it and it took the genius of one man, Simon Langham, to take to his shed and develop the prototype Unirider that, in mass production, under the care of Mountain Buggy, I have come to adore.

Let me explain why, if you have an age appropriate child and want to do something brilliant, this device is a no-brainer of a purchase.

I’ll let Mountain Buggy explain what the Unirider is and then we’ll look at my experience with it since we unfurled it around Kent at Christmas 2016.

One parent, one child, one wheel! Stand out from the crowd with unirider – a unique riding experience that develops balance and confidence for your child, as well as having so much fun! Unirider is a fun alternative for your little one when out and about; it provides a sense of freedom for your growing toddler while still keeping them within your fingertips. Unirider performs perfectly on all terrain with its 12″ airfilled tyre. It’s so lightweight, making it incredibly easy to lift over small obstacles – super fun for those off road adventures! You can even jog with unirider using only one hand – Mountain Buggy manoeuvrability at its best! But just remember, be safe and ensure your child wears a safety helmet whilst active with unirider! Read more about the product and origins of the Unirider here

If you were being unkind you might call it a wheel, seat and stick combination, which in truth it could be argued it is, but it’s so much more than that and you don’t really get it until you open the box and feel it.

First impressions: I pretended that this was a gift for UltraBaby but the truth is this was a gift for a running parent who loves getting muddy with his daughter. As I opened it I felt the weight of the plastic and the wheel, and although not massively heavy, had a feeling of quality, durability and security. The bold yellow moulded plastic seat is a design masterpiece.


I put together the Unirider is a couple of minutes and offered UltraBaby the opportunity of a ride round the house – she instinctively knew that the seat was for her and she sat comfortably, feet raised onto the rests ready for a quick spin round the house. We did a few quick runs, a few tight turns and then an unceremonious dismount but we were a go!

I was surprised by the level of detail that had gone into the device even though I was very familiar with Mountain Buggy products given my adoration of the MB Terrain, our trail running and adventuring Buggy. The handle grip for the pilot is well considered and grippy – feeling more like a Vibram sole than a handle, the grip for the rider is soft and comfortable and the length of the device is perfect for both me and my partner (we just use it at slightly differing angles). The wheel which looks like it’s been lifted straight from the Urban Jungle Buggy is an air filled wheel which runs well on any surface – giving both good traction when necessary on say trail or ice but also moving speedily across smoother surfaces.


Second impressions: The big test for me though wasn’t bimbling round the house it was seeing how the Unirider would fare against a hilly, muddy trail run and also how would UltraBaby appreciate being unprotected by her buggy as she got much closer to nature?

I need not have worried about the attitude of my adventure orientated child!


I decided to start her at my local muddy dog walking trail, Ashenbank Woods. We’d built up a little excitement about using our ‘bike’. She placed her helmet on and once again climbed aboard the Unirider – this time we bounded off across the wet mud, leaping over roots, smashing through branches and undergrowth and generally having an awesome time.

I was surprised how simple it was to pick up the running with the Unirider but how difficult it is to truly master, it takes a little bit of skill to assault a trail at full speed when you can’t pump your arms! That’s not to say using the Unirider is difficult – because it’s not but there’s more to it than simply pushing – it requires a little bit of unison between you and your child, and that’s the key to really enjoying it.


As we become more experienced… Running at my slower 5km speed (5min kilometre) up and down hills was hard but rewarding work and as the weeks have rolled on we’ve gotten significantly better and less exhausted! I’ve become rather adept at the one handed running, using a GoPro, answering the phone, etc and UltraBaby has really gotten to grips with leaning into the corners and adapting her weight for the terrain.

It’s impressive watching her leaning back into the seat as we pour forwards downhill, my local BMX/dirt bike track has certainly seen some miles put in from us and UltraBaby never fails to impress in her rider role.


Urban Jungle: With expanded usage we are also using the Unirider for more urban adventures such as trips to the shops and here it excels too, the length of the rider isn’t so long as to be intrusive in shops and the bright vibrant yellow offers a ‘howdly doodley’ to the oncoming human traffic. As I’ve said UltraBaby has learnt to lean into a turn and this I’ve found very helpful for urban cornering and rounding aisles in shops.


Other considerations: Some might argue that the downside is that the rider can’t sleep when it’s in use but what I’ve found is that the quality of the sleep she has post ride is deeper and better.

I’ve also found that UltraBaby enjoys the quick ‘off&on’ provided by the Unirider – when she wants off (be it in the urban environment or not) she simply asks and if appropriate we bob her forward and let her feet gently touch the ground before dismount.

Quick, easy, comfortable, efficient and fun, the best words to describe a truly tremendous product.

Distance covered: In the 7 weeks since we set the roads of Kent ablaze with the Unirider we’ve probably covered about 80-100 miles as we do use it mainly at the weekends or for when the GingaNinja is dog walking with UltraBaby (on a Thursday and Friday). It’s unlikely to replace a buggy outright, especially in cases like mine, where the buggy is a conduit to more extreme sports but is a wonderful addition to our outdoor life. The important thing to remember though is that it shouldn’t curb their own desire to run and jump about. I very much see the Unirider as the thing we use to reach and extend adventure – not curtail it. I will often carry her scooter on my back so that she can whizz round under her own steam and then return to the safety of the Unirider later.


Next steps: There are a few things we’d like to do with the Unirider over the next few months – as I’m returning to full fitness the Unirider gets ever easier and we are tackling further and further distance, so more of that methinks. However, we are likely to cap our (running) adventuring to about 10km, on the positive side thoughthere will be no limit to hiking adventures where she can ‘on&off’ as often as she likes. Parkrun will likely be a next target too and I wonder if the Unirider will be faster than the Mountain Buggy Terrain – we shall see. Other than that the Unirider will probably go to Barcelona and Madeira with us to allow for longer sightseeing options.


Conclusions: The Unirider is a thoughtful and well constructed device which is as much fun for parents as it is for your children. When it works at its best, pilot and rider act as though they have a symbiotic relationship. It is brilliant and with a reasonable price point. I have lots of love for Mountain Buggy kit and I’ll be sorry when UltraBaby finally outgrows their stuff but for the time being we are having the most fun possible – together!

If you’re thinking of getting one you really won’t regret it. Check out the Mountain Buggy website for more information.

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